1. |
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So you ‘re forty single and looking for romance
It’s late at night you ve had enough of all those bars with drunks
The leaves are falling on the ground
but you’re not ready yet to be homebound
So you hit the clubs where you think it’s easy to get lai
But after sex with one twenty year old
Your only satisfaction is in the kitchen bowl stuffing yourf face with cake
So you revert to Jim at work who flirts with your best friend
Come xmas he ll hook up with her and that will be its end
And then you ll feel emotional and leave the party early
Log on to online dating , chat with a 30 something
Only to discover he s got a gaming habit
He s only free one hour a week and he thinks having kids is tragic
And the only other guys that message you are either dull or creepy
They send you picks of you know what that only make you weepy
And you think to yourself
Where have all the good guys gone ?
Have your chances all been blown ?
Come spring you think of getting thin but since you know that gyms are grim
You opt for tango lessons hoping mr Right will come
But all you find is that socially awkward
dude for whom life isn’t much fun
You ask him out but he just stands and stares like he s afraid
That you ll see he s as pure as they day he was born
He never touched a girl after his mum caught him red handed with the porn
Now summer’s here and all the new formed couples are about
You smile but inside you just cringe and really wanna shout
Fuck off this isn’t fair ! I deserve love just like you !
Do you know how long I ve been without a screw ?
And then the psycho guy whose wife divorced him last july
He thinks he can have you easy , so he gives you the eye
But you still got some dignity you ll never stoop so low
You exist stage salute him with a bow
And you think to yourself
Where have all the good guys gone ?
I am so tired of being alone
Is my heart turning to stone
Where have all the good guys , where have they gone ?
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2. |
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Woke up this morning
Bad taste in my mouth
A feeling of doom
Hangs about in the room
Don’t go to Dave’s birthday
You will not like the crowd
I ignore all my feelings
Put clothes on and chill out
Go to work til half six
Shower, make up, wine fix
Car won’t start what a drag
Take the bus, smoke a fag, curse out loud
At the party I see
Dave’s not there but there’s Steve
Plus new girl, my ex boyfriend
The tequila is a godsend
But as soon as it’s down
Comes back up as I heave
Moonbeam and Jade
stare at me from the corner
Though they know me quite well
I’m not part of their tribe
‘Light anoooother one….
Just like the other one…”
crack a joke, don’t you spoil the good vibe
It reminds me of the story of the elephant
That miss Murray used to tell us in school
Don’t assume that you’ve got the full picture
Or you will end up being the fool
Next there’s Crystal who’s has witnessed the scene from afar fingerpick
dressed in white , that's her style, puts her hand on my heart
“it’s all part of the plan
just believe that you can
then she smiles
But then Flame jumps on site
pulls me on the dance floor
“look at me , I'm a fairy, I'm a fairy you know?
You should just party more
All afflictions ignore
Say yes only to joy, the rest no !”
Thank God Mike comes to save me right then
Paracetamol’s the right answer to pain
You just ate something rotten
Soon it’ll all be forgotten
There is nothing that science can’t explain !
So I sit on the couch, gulp my water and pill
And I don’t even notice Damian sneer at my side
“They run blind the rat race
until death wins the chase
and the sooner you get it, the worse is the ride”
Quick! I fake some distraction
Till the loud interruption
“Come to church!” shouts Dolores
dropping leaflets around
“Only Jesus can save
reject Satan, be brave!
In the bible all the answers are found !”
It reminds me of the story of the elephant
That miss Murray used to tell us in school
Don’t assume that you’ve got the full picture
Or you will end up being the fool
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3. |
The Box
03:56
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The box
this is the story of a very special box
young miss Laura found it and gave it to her lover Rob
after a while it was they decided they would move in
living together would be like a magical ride
or a balloon in the wind
she put the box on their table always in sight
symbol of their new romance
emblem of their love's delight
dudududu
you only get what you see
every day Laura shone it, left it right open for Rob
so he could admire its beauty all around the clock
but as hard as he tried the poor boy he could not understand
why it was something special so he grew angry
could no more pretend
he hid the box in a cupboard out of her sight
would not tell where or why
until it ended in a fight
duududu
you only get what you see
Laura went mad with sadness until the box was found
then she went out the door and threw it on the ground
Rob saw her leave and could not help but notice the sound
he went outside and saw it smashed in pieces
scattered all around
he tried as hard as he could to fix the box
but it was too late now the balloon had come to a stop
dudddudu
you only get what you see
what do you see ?
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4. |
Big Wanker
02:22
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The minute you walked in the room
I wished that men like you were in extinction
A real big wanker
Sun Glasses suit and tie
Wouldn’t you like to know
What’s going on in my mind
So let me get straight to the point
It’s not the cash that makes men sexy can’t you see
Hey Big Wanker
Get the hell away from me
How I wish you’d get lost , lost lost
I don’t care about your Porsche, your spa, your swanky watch, your hogwash
Don’t you give me that smug smile
Only makes you look more vile
I rather you were poor but smart
That kinda guy that makes a girl laugh with banter
But you re such a wanker
Stop looking so surprised
If you want some action you better engage with my mind
So let me get straight to the point
Have you ever heard the best things in life are free
Hey big wanker
Hey big wanker
Hey big wanker
If you want some titillation
You better come up with a decent topic of conversation
For me
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5. |
Sweet Bitter Enemy
04:02
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Poison
You are poison
Poison for my blood (repeat)
You’re poison
You’re poison
You’re poison for my blood (
So why do I want you, so much
If you’re poison, poison for my blood
)Why do I crave for you to finish me
You Kill me you kill me kill me with your cruelty
You Kill me you kill me In the throes of ecstasy
Kill me kill me oh please kill me
I want to be your victim
A victim of your eyes
Gimme a lethal injection
Filled with fear and Desire (SING TWICE, SECOND TIME HIGHER)
I see you’ve come to visit me tonight
Woke me up and gave me a huge big fright
And then…
You kill me you kill me you kill me with your cruelty
You kill me you kill me my sweet bitter enemy
You kill you kill me in the throes of ecstasy
You kill me you kill me
My bitter sweet enemy
You’re the spider
In my nightmare
My sweet bitter enemy
You’re my spider
You’re my nightmare
Are you dreaming of me?
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6. |
Il Pescatore
02:53
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Sei troppo intenso non ti riesco a gestire
Quella testa che gira ti fa solo impazzire
Tu che sei cosi intelligente
Usi il potere della mente
contro te stesso
e ti viene il chiodo fisso
di trovre mille soluzioni
e invece trovi mille ragioni
per non seguirle mai
Non rieco a starti dietro
sei diventato quasi cieco
sei il tuo peggior nemico
e qualunque cosa dico
non ti raggiungera
Continuo a darti cio che posso
ma tu non riesci a mollar l'osso
sei ossessionato da te stesso
e non t'importa piu nemmeno il sesso
Sei perso in labirinti cinti di paure ed ansieta'
e non riesci piu a distinguere la verita'
dall'irreale
ma e' la paura il tuo vero male
Apri gli occhi senza giudicare
datti una mano solo tu ti puoi aiutare
non lo troverai mai un significato
quello che ti dici e' solo fiato sprecato
quello che conta e' che tu sia felice
ascolta solo cio che alla felicita conduce
pensieri come pesci in un torrente in movimento
tu sei il pescatore
non ti ci buttare dentro
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7. |
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Not a lot of people are aware
That young Queen Victoria was not a maiden fair
In fact she was a very sassy one
Liking her man to be, lots of fun
Many a night they spent entwined
Like a, prickly rose to a , clinging vine
And, many a witness heard them scream and shout
Cries and moans of pleasure day in and, day out
So much she squeezed of the poor king to be
That he just expired like spent male bee
And there she was left all alone and sad
Without a lover in her, empty bed
She spent all days lamenting her departed king
Without the possibility of another fling
Her frustration mounted and became so great
That She wanted everyone to share her fate
If I can’t get laid than nobody can be !
This I impose now by Regal Decree!
You all shall suffer the pain I’m in!
Sex is bad, sex is a sin !
From that day on everyone got dressed in black
And Had to be covered from shoes to hat
No parts of the body were to be shown
Nothing of sex could ever be known
Except in the secret space of the whore house
Where depraved women went without blouse
And all sorts of twisted things were seen
By all men brave enough and keen
Oh Queen Victoria you ruined us all!
Only because you had a twist of bad luck
I wonder how different things could have been
If you could have had, another fuck
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Elyssa Vulpes New Zealand
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